Stepping Out of His Shadows – Written Sunday 1st December 2019 (Aged 44)

Stepping Out of His Shadows

i am not my father
or my dad
i do not drag around his baggage
or share a cap
but his mental health
is thrown over me
in the largest buckets
and then, i am him
whenever they taste that wind
that blows in familiar ways
i must relive
his painfully abusive days
when cake was rich and deep
but every slice
contaminated our sleep
i am not my father
but in his absence
i have often shuffled
in bare skinned shoes
they said it to me as a boy
when i was such a toy
that they could not find a box
in which to place me
i cannot escape him
we seem to have similar cards
with similar fates
but that is not true nor is it fair
i have my unique flaws
and my own identity which i wear
i am not my father




More poems at https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/




James Garratt – Sunday 1st DEcember 2019