all the things society wants you to be
gender, status and sexuality
burn the midnight oil,
with the fuel of your creativity

where are we travelling to
what happens next
who draws your breath
who makes the heart beat

it is hard,
in life you have to keep fit
and your hope,
has to be freshly lit

there is one part of me
telling me,
i am fucking amazing
and another part telling me
i am not worth shit

cannot change the past
but at times, when looking back
it feels like it’s going to last

falling in love
and shared flats
all becoming never quite enough

you cannot wear your parents clothes
they should not fit
you cannot should their lives
they should be too heavy to lift

i wish
i wish i had stood my ground
overwhelmed as i was
confidence more lost than found

it was either –
compassion or creativity
one of the two –
that would pull me forwards