Understanding What You See – Written Approx. Late 1993 or January 1994 (Aged 18)

Understanding What You See

I have got to get away,
there is no one here,
I am only ever, myself,
no one is near.

Then she rings,
and I have got –
a telephone
stuck on my ear,
and she shows me
that I am a child,
full of innocence
and fear.

And someone
who is getting
more cynical
as I get older.
No wonder
this place is run
by fools,
it can’t get
any colder.

And I can’t help
but look at him
and say,
I told you.
But knowing you
is something special,
getting out
of my teenage years,
so glad my mind
is still alive.

I consider myself
a champion –
just to be alive.

Rattled and smashed
are my jars of dreams,
pots of fear,
empty,
devoid of anything
except stale atmosphere.

This world is a farce.

I remember
a dark time,
a past
that I thought
would always last.

But I was lucky,
I got away
so fast,
and I ran straight
into your arms.

But I thought
my past
was behind me,
yet, the trick is,
you must understand
what it is
you see.

James Garratt – 1993/1994

More poems at
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/

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https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/2020/01/08/the-boy-behind-the-glasses-an-introduction/

More poems from 1993 and 1994 here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-1993/ https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-1994/