Hate – Written March 1995 (Aged 20)

Hate

Do you hate me as well?
Just about everyone else does…

I have had enough —
lost in a world of paranoia,
grabbing hands
that are not really there,
never knowing.

But here I am.
Not even God will give me a break.
But then our relationship
has always been love–hate.

I feel for you, I really do,
but I am lost in a world
with just too many shades of blue.
I have lost all that I never had.
I am sitting here trying to relax,
scared to answer the phone.

Isolation is my killer,
just like being alone —
even if they are one and the same.
I did not create the spirit of chaos;
I can’t be to blame.

And I am fed up
of everyone giving me advice —
the type
which just leaves me feeling uptight
and somehow not quite right.
I am fed up of hate.

James Garratt – March 1995

More poems at
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/

More about this blog, The Boy Behind the Glasses, here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/2020/01/08/the-boy-behind-the-glasses-an-introduction/

More poems from 1995 here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-1995/