Look For Crosses – Written Saturday 7th April 2006 (Aged 31)

James Garratt,

Look For Crosses

you would rather –
i be autistic…
or, ‘backward’,
or, somehow nasty…
or lacking in friends…
you would rather –
that i was not so sure
because,
it gives you an excuse
for your own bitterness
for the emotional mess
that you are
it suits you to put me down
to rubbish my life…
to take a swipe
at my future wife
you would rather –
moan and bitch
be always negative
and never scratch that itch
look for crosses
and ignore the ticks




James Garratt – Saturday 7th April 2006


More poems at
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/


More about this blog, The boy Behind the Glasses, here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/2020/01/08/the-boy-behind-the-glasses-an-introduction/


More poems from 2006 here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-2006/

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Published by James Garratt

I am a 40 something sometime writer. I live in the South West of the UK but originally I am from Essex.

15 Comments

    1. Thank you – I’ve buried all this stuff away. I’m mortified by this period of writing but that’s for personal reasons :). Glad you liked it though :). I wish I’d never written pieces like this and I wish what was happening in my life at the time hadn’t happened. But, that’s life… thank you though – everything is important in terms of writing no matter how you personally feel about it.

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      2. :). I can always do that. I was too young to understand personality disorders and the mental health of someone else. Which is interesting, because later on it was something I went on to work with.

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      4. Well the world is full of traumatised people – it’s how we manage it. I’m a social worker, so that is why I ended up working within mental health. However people who you bring into your life, have severe trauma and than unleash that on you, are very hard to deal with. Especially you’re a 31 year old who still didn’t really know who they were.

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      5. Oh I know how that feels. My second boyfriend had a borderline personality disorder – not easy to deal with at all. You are right – it is how we manage it. Everyone’s got baggage. 🙂

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      7. Yes, I am. I was 19 back then… now I’m 40. A lot of time has passed since then… lots of time to learn about life – mine and others’. 🙂 There will always be ups and downs, but that’s how it is – when your foundation is solid, you won’t be shaken so easily. Hope, you’re okay, too! 🙂

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