Teenage Hype – Written Approx. Late 1993 or January 1994 (Aged 18)

Teenage Hype

I am just me, that is all I am
you are only yourself
that is all that we are
I am not into teenage hype
I am getting out of my teens,
barely alive
a seven-year-long fight
thirteen to nineteen, no dream
so unfair,
thirteen to nineteen living a nightmare
and I feel so hollow and shallow
teenage life is a nasty monster
that eats you and likes to swallow –
until there is nothing left
I have never felt so much pain
I have smoked, drunk, had sex
broken down, laughed out loud –
and wondered why
I had to have girlfriends,
but I lost them –
and then got so upset
I am just me and I am sorry –
but what did it all mean in the end?
I feel like some emotional car wreck
left on the side of life’s road
nothing to do and nowhere to go
and yes, I even feel old
I am only me now,
a product of my teenage years
where I started out innocent
and ended up,
shacking up with my fears
busy trying to repent
for some, I am sure it was great
but for others, it was something to hate
I have been so poor
and there has got to be something more
hasn’t there?

James Garratt – 1993/1994

More poems at
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https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/2020/01/08/the-boy-behind-the-glasses-an-introduction/

More poems from 1993 and 1994 here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-1993/ https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-1994/