Compelled To Confess – Written February 2023 (Aged 47)

Compelled To Confess

i look back on younger me
with my mental health
and threads of toxicity
shoes of gold,
dipped in solid naivety
who was i trying to be
falling in love,
with a buffet of different people
a desert of solenoid dreams
i was a mess,
and it is hard to come clean
but these days –
that is what it’s about
the chances that were made
and how hurt used to shout
others tell me,
that they never ran scared
and the hedonism –
of younger days
was all there was to wear
now they quaff gin
and never dare to lay it bare
i however,
can do nothing of the sort
i am compelled to confess
as others spill sweet coffee –
down their pretty dress
i look back on younger me
with a painful wince –
in those long lost plays
where we tried to convince




James Garratt – February 2023


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