So, If I Had
so, if i’d had a relationship with you
this would now be my reality
this messed up personality
this unwelcome insanity
now is a good time to look
and see why it did not go further
look at your behaviour now
somehow, it tells a story
and a story never really told
so, if i’d had a relationship with you
i’d be dealing with all this
this selfish view and a lack of sight
but i’d be warm by the pyre
watching a relationship burn so bright
i don’t want messed up people
with selfish messed up lived
i want what i have got,
something beautiful that opens my eyes
James Garratt – Tuesday 12th February 2002
More poems at
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/
More about this blog, The Boy Behind the Glasses, here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/2020/01/08/the-boy-behind-the-glasses-an-introduction/
More poems from 2002 here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-2002/
So, If I Had – Written Tuesday 12th February 2002 (Aged 26)
The Boy Behind The Glasses. Poetry and Writing 
A great poem. Watching this relationship burn from a safe distance… I like how you took yourself out of the picture and assume the role of spectator. There is a bit of pain in this, but also, a lot of distance. Sounds healthy.
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Thank you – I can’t quite remember who this is about, I have an idea but not sure.. It’s funny how the intensity of situations, things that dominated your thoughts at one time are completely forgotten over time. I think there is an inner insecurity and reassurance in pieces like this, I was reaffirming some choices I had made were the correct ones
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Sometimes it is good to look a the written word… to let decisions and emotions set. It always helps me. And yes, it is interesting, that time lets things fade we deemed so important. Happens to me as well. 🙂
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🙂 x – I guess to some extent we all live in moments (is that a poem idea?)
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Go for it! 😉 I have written many pieces about exactly this theme… even a recent one (Once In a Blue Moon). It is a theme I revisit quite frequently. 🙂
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Me too 🙂
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