So Long and Goodbye – Written May 2007 (Aged 32)

James Garratt,

So Long and Goodbye

they belittled my clumsiness
oh well,
my balance remains a mess
actually,
i like my clumsiness
they picked up on my eye contact
and the silent, ‘no’
that has always proceeded the word, ‘eye’
oh well,
i like my eyes
i wonder,
if in fact it is their own awkwardness
their own social stammer
their own attempts to hide and smother
i wonder,
what forces to highlight perceived faults in others
oh well, i am not perfect
and as i sail off onto the sunset
with my imperfections at full mast
i will turn and face their shoreline
and give my two fingered funnel one final blast
they picked up on my social interaction
though in truth, it has always been riot
i think in truth,
the problem is their own dissatisfaction
and their mind numbing quiet
oh, well, oh my, so long and goodbye




James Garratt – May 2007


More poems at
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/


More about this blog, The Boy Behind the Glasses, here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/2020/01/08/the-boy-behind-the-glasses-an-introduction/


More poems from 2007 here
https://theboybehindtheglasses.com/category/poems-and-writing-2007/

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Published by James Garratt

I am a 40 something sometime writer. I live in the South West of the UK but originally I am from Essex.

13 Comments

    1. Thank you. That’s a good way of looking at it. In terms of myself, I called a ceasefire with myself some years ago and we negotiated a peace treaty :). Hope you’re well and everything is okay with you 🙂

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  2. So cool. I really like how this feels… how you highlight the emotions so elegantly. This sounds like you are at peace with who you are – and that is a beautiful thing. If they don’t like you, go elsewhere. 😉
    The “social stammer” is such a spot on phrase – love it!

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    1. In a way, yes. It’s really tricky with pieces like this because in the moment it was about a specific person but now, in hindsight, I can see the bigger picture. In the poem I am at ease with myself, and I do think some of that was true at the time but in the wider context, I was over defensive and I tend to see these sort of poems like that. If it didn’t matter, I would probably wouldn’t have written about it. Now, much older and with more emotional maturity I would have never let the events behind this and other writing happen and I’d dealt with them differently. Long reply, sorry 🙂

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      1. No need to say sorry for that. 🙂 I like it when you give me a glimpse of what was going on back then from your “now-perspective”… it is very interesting. I would not do a lot of things I went through ever again, but I am glad I did, because every last (sometimes VERY shitty) experience made me who I am today – and I like who I am today. I hope it is the same for you. 🙂

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    2. Fundamentally in life and in writing, you shouldn’t have to justify yourself to people who either don’t care and actively don’t like you and maybe this poem falls into that category – I don’t like poems where I feel like I am having to justify myself.

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