the nights of chep drink
and so much cheap think
being sick and fighting
learning with tentative steps
it was all so… enlightening
and of course, so much fun

and last week i was only sixteen
and last month,
i am sure i was only nine
and life was still letting me dream
and even then, my cracked world seemed fine

i will tell you,
i am so tired of the people
i have got a brain
it is, partially insane
but they always take,

it really doesn’t matter
what you think of me
no, it doesn’t, not really
over there is blindness
and you can’t see beyond there

i have lived by carefully constructed maps
i have believed in my own security
but it is all so random
you make plans
yet life is something that you can never fathom

i have a decision to make
because,
i heard a story

when will i hold you
be with you,
telling you, laugh with you
a chance in the dark
seems better than a disused park