but with her arms around me
and legs so tightly wrapped
dependency beckons
and there is no going back

they say they are right
and it is others –
who are not very bright
and they insist,
that no one else is ever missed

i saw the baby last night
just a week old
a life just waiting
for the world to unfold

its message was loud and clear
strangely,
it made me want her more
and i wanted to pull her near

it is there
on the tip of my tongue
i almost say it
then the words stare at the sun

you found things
which i thought were lost
things hidden in boxes
under the stairs or up in the loft

my anger towards you,
i fear,
it will never truly subside
it is the way you dig

i try to be secure
and i try not to be such a wreck
i try to calm down
and i try not to fret

my insecurity,
mounting one futile charge
on my hopes and dreams