you know,
i once dressed up in destruction
as a passion
but it left me
wondering how i would go on

those other men,
have the life lived before
the pretend it does not matter
but they still peek behind former doors

but they were too busy –
taking down personal shelves
and trying to work out
why the ice cream always melts

you got married
and assumed the ring would always fit
the honeymoon,
spent on a rollercoaster
really made you fit

i wish i could dance as i used to
i wish i could sleep easier
i wish eventualities,
commonalities and consequence
had never been explained to me

i am collecting ideas
but they are only the cut out –
to every jigsaw –
i have ever owned