two years –
since you went away
but did you –
ever really stay?

is it such a surprise –
that they overfed you
with all their insecurity and lies

but i have always felt –
reassuringly small in the universe
accepting that my time is relatively brief
spending a lifetime in different seasons
turning over a different leaf

their roller coaster mental health –
leaves me queasy
and confrontation –
never comes that easy

do we save ourselves –
or do we save others?
do we impeach our dreams –
or hide under the covers?

looking at decisions
and, did i do right?
did the wrong ships –
sail off into the night?

for a while –
i was caught in a trap –
of thinking –
only i could be to blame

maybe she was not –
as i imagined her to be
maybe my mind –
has played its favourite tricks